Matt, very well written and certainly relates to many of us who are experiencing the same spectrum of emotions that you are. I am jealous of your ability to pen what's on your mind. You are a talented writer.
As you may know, I too began my fatherhood journey at 45. One aspect of my journey with my son Ryker, that I was looking for in your piece was how, if any, your relationship with your own father is influencing your relationship with Hunter?
For me, almost every moment with my son Ryker involves a memory of my recently passed father and myself. I mention this specifically because our sons (like mine) will likely not have much of their grandfather's direct influence. The three of us, my father, Ryker, and I, are inseparable as I am in the middle, and I most certainly want Ryker to recall his memories of me when raising his own children.
As always, I thank you for your though provoking essays.
Beautiful post Matt - thank you for sharing your story; I look forward to reading more. Having just entered my 40's last year, I find a lot of it relatable.
Matt, this was a joy to read. Thank you for taking me through the intricate labyrinth of your own emotional landscape as you step into the minefield that is : fatherhood. Welcome !
I've birthed and raised, and still do, 5 children. I always say that parenting IS my spiritual path. It's the space through which I get to meet myself - the good, the bad, and the ugly. Welcome to my world LOL
I love to see how not only are you raising Hunter, but clearly, he's also raising you, and you also are raising your inner child. Just beautiful to watch this unfolding. Not to say that the unfolding itself is always beautiful - it's often messy and painful.
Looking forward to following along your journey of self-discovery through the privileged journey of parenthood. ✨🙂
I love this! I remember one of my esteemed professors sharing a story about finding out that she was pregnant with her first child. She commented on how she thought she was "all set and ready" because she was organized, rule bound, and highly structured. A colleague commented "oh, that will make it harder!" Later, this same aforementioned pregnant professor realized the wisdom in that comment. Flexibility, responsive parenting and shifting priorities/expectations---the challenges of parenting.
I’ve completed a nuclear engineering curriculum, spent months at a time submerged on a nuclear submarine, and served on seven overseas deployments — including a year and a half in combat zones in the Middle East.
And yet, nothing compares to the challenges — and humbling beauty — of parenthood.
I wouldn’t trade it for anything.
My son has taught me more about life and about myself than I ever thought possible.
He’s six now, and I treasure every single day.
I often wish I could bottle these moments, because I feel the sand of time slipping through my fingers — and I know how precious this season truly is.
I understand! A friend of mine shared with me—as her children grew up—that every age is “the best age”. Totally true. I still feel that way, and my daughters are adults!
Such vulnerability, Such uncertainty, Such honesty. Simply beautiful..😇
Matt, very well written and certainly relates to many of us who are experiencing the same spectrum of emotions that you are. I am jealous of your ability to pen what's on your mind. You are a talented writer.
As you may know, I too began my fatherhood journey at 45. One aspect of my journey with my son Ryker, that I was looking for in your piece was how, if any, your relationship with your own father is influencing your relationship with Hunter?
For me, almost every moment with my son Ryker involves a memory of my recently passed father and myself. I mention this specifically because our sons (like mine) will likely not have much of their grandfather's direct influence. The three of us, my father, Ryker, and I, are inseparable as I am in the middle, and I most certainly want Ryker to recall his memories of me when raising his own children.
As always, I thank you for your though provoking essays.
I welcome your thoughts. (maybe DM in FB)
Chris
Beautiful post Matt - thank you for sharing your story; I look forward to reading more. Having just entered my 40's last year, I find a lot of it relatable.
Matt, this was a joy to read. Thank you for taking me through the intricate labyrinth of your own emotional landscape as you step into the minefield that is : fatherhood. Welcome !
I've birthed and raised, and still do, 5 children. I always say that parenting IS my spiritual path. It's the space through which I get to meet myself - the good, the bad, and the ugly. Welcome to my world LOL
I love to see how not only are you raising Hunter, but clearly, he's also raising you, and you also are raising your inner child. Just beautiful to watch this unfolding. Not to say that the unfolding itself is always beautiful - it's often messy and painful.
Looking forward to following along your journey of self-discovery through the privileged journey of parenthood. ✨🙂
I love this! I remember one of my esteemed professors sharing a story about finding out that she was pregnant with her first child. She commented on how she thought she was "all set and ready" because she was organized, rule bound, and highly structured. A colleague commented "oh, that will make it harder!" Later, this same aforementioned pregnant professor realized the wisdom in that comment. Flexibility, responsive parenting and shifting priorities/expectations---the challenges of parenting.
Hi Christine,
I’ve completed a nuclear engineering curriculum, spent months at a time submerged on a nuclear submarine, and served on seven overseas deployments — including a year and a half in combat zones in the Middle East.
And yet, nothing compares to the challenges — and humbling beauty — of parenthood.
I wouldn’t trade it for anything.
My son has taught me more about life and about myself than I ever thought possible.
He’s six now, and I treasure every single day.
I often wish I could bottle these moments, because I feel the sand of time slipping through my fingers — and I know how precious this season truly is.
I understand! A friend of mine shared with me—as her children grew up—that every age is “the best age”. Totally true. I still feel that way, and my daughters are adults!
This is beautifully done! Really captures the joys and fears of parenting, especially when it comes later in life, which I can relate to.